Are all funny calendars embarrassing? Nope, ours isn't.
Finally Monday again, finally back to the office! Wait—are you serious? Then get out of here, you've definitely come to the wrong place. We're the natural enemies of calendars with witty sayings that aren't even funny on second glance. The sheer number of calendar jokes we see these days is a bit embarrassing for us. That's why, despite all our laziness, we've taken it upon ourselves to create funny wall calendars full of bitter humor and a healthy dose of demotivation.
With us, you won't get those cotton-candy sayings like "Don't dream your life, live your dream," because that would make us think about breakfast even while we're writing. Our motto is: " Before you do something, do nothing. " And why are we telling you that? Well, our boss said this morning that you're exactly the right person, and what's missing is a demotivating 2025 calendar . We don't question things like that; we simply rattle off our sayings and hope you see it the same way.
If you have any risks or side effects, eat your wall calendar and just stay at home
Imagine you walk into the office in January 2025 and someone actually put up one of those motivational calendars. "Today is the first day of the rest of your life," beams out at you in flowing letters, and you feel your throat literally catching in breath. You can't even manage a quiet "Who was that?" because everyone thinks the calendar is funny, except you.
Such an experience can have consequences and trigger side effects! You could feel a latent nausea all day and the irrepressible urge to simply eat the calendar full of sayings. Before you upset your stomach with "Live, Love, Laugh," a tear-off calendar with sayings that actually mean something is a better choice. The motto here is: " Don't dream your life, just keep your mouth shut. " These are the witty calendar sayings that sarcastic people like you need to live (or rather, to survive) in an environment full of overly motivated Monday lovers.
We have a wall or desk calendar for every need that will reliably suppress your motivation . While it won't let you skip Monday or buy your boss an apartment on the moon, it can at least help you develop a sense of gallows humor when everything goes as expected. A REALLY funny calendar can even manage to be funny when you can't even open your eyes properly.
Do really funny desk calendars have side effects?
Supposedly funny calendars that aren't funny at all trigger nausea, shortness of breath, uncontrollable hysteria, and acute reluctance. Okay, that last one's a lie—you're not in the mood anyway. If a demotivating desk calendar adorns your desk at work, these side effects fortunately won't occur. But it's not entirely risk-free either.
If you're unlucky, the daily calendar sayings are so funny that you'll miss the office on vacation . No, of course not because of your colleagues or work—this is just about your calendar. Otherwise, funny wall or desk calendars are really harmless and easy to tolerate. Sometimes we glance at the calendar, read funny sayings, and suddenly feel motivated. We don't even know why that happens. But the boss thinks it's a good thing, because we're usually masters of demotivation.
Are there funny tear-off calendars with staff to tear off the pages?
To be honest, we've asked ourselves that question many times. We really like our tear-off calendar with sayings (open the window, self-praise stinks). But what's really annoying is that we constantly have to get up and tear off a page. Hey, for that price, we should have included the tear-off service, right? It's not, because of inflation and all that. After all, professional tear-off services for wall calendars charge minimum wage, and who can afford that?
If you're one of those lazy planners, there are also funny 2025 calendars available as practical desk calendars. Get up? Save yourself the trouble; you can simply tear off the page while sitting down. And if that's too much effort for you, just get a weekly or monthly calendar. That way, you only have to get up once a week or month and tear at the calendar. Come on, you can do it; the sarcastic, realistic saying will reward you for it.
FAQ: If you don’t read, we’ll write anyway
Do humorless people actually find funny wall calendars funny?
Definitely not. They'll stare at him like a 10th-grade math problem. But that's where it gets funny for you; you can laugh at the looks. We can't help people who think the word irony has something to do with iron .
Can I answer all of my colleagues' questions with the sayings from the wall calendar?
Absolutely! With sayings like "I'm not lazy, I save energy," you can end any small talk elegantly. Even if your boss asks if you've finished the project, a quick nod to the calendar is enough. There's always a suitable answer to questions, even if the other person doesn't want to hear it.
If a motivational calendar hangs between two demotivational calendars, is that an educational gap?
This isn't just a gap in our education, but also a perversion of taste and an insult to our demotivational calendars. In such company, they feel like a smoothie at a chip shop.
How many calories does my boss's motivational calendar have?
We estimate that's about 10,000 calories if you eat it all. The sugary motivational quotes make the sugar content extremely high. Alternatively, you can decorate your wastebasket with it. This saves calories and keeps your mood steady.
Do funny sayings in a calendar create a better mood in the office?
No, there's really no reason for a good mood in the office. But it certainly ensures that the colleague with the motivational calendar keeps checking in on you and secretly wishes he'd bought your wall calendar .
